"Yes sir."

What’s that?"

What’s what sir?"

"Well sir, I captured him and I played with him a while and now he’s resting a bit. And maybe I’ll play with him some more."

"Gophers don’t play with dogs Abby. What were you doing with him?"

"Well, sir, I beg to differ a little bit from your own opinion as I think we wuz playing. Leastways I was throwing him up in the air and catching him and running around with him in my mouth. So I think we wuz playing which would be a different thought from your own. I think he’s just a little tired right now."

"Well Abby I would agree that he’s tired because he’s just laying there but at least he’s still breathing which is more than I can say for the last one you caught."

"Well, sir, let me ‘splain about that last one as we didn’t quite know he was a gopher because we’d only heard them gophers and never really seen a live one before and then he came over from the horse farm yonder and started running on top of the ground and well, we didn’t know he was sorta fragile if you follow what I’m saying here. You know that gopher turned out be be fragile-like and we wuz playing tug ‘o’ war with him well, sir, and he kinda broke."

"I know he broke. I had to pick him up. And you know why he broke Abby?"

"No sir, not really. I think he wuz, like I said, fragile you know."

"He broke because in your game of tug’o’war, you and Keeper used him as the rope."

"Uh, huh."

Abby's in trouble again!!!

"So let’s not break this one. Here, I’ll get my gloves on and now I’ll put him over the fence."

Well . . . . just a minute sir!!! I don’t know. . . . . . . can’t I just carry him around and throw him in the air and catch him just for a while longer. He don’t mind . . . . . much."

"Abby, we don’t want these gophers in our yard because they dig holes and such. So we don’t want him feeling welcome or anything. We’d rather he went back to the farm where he came from. That’s where his family is. So I’m going to put him over the fence like this and . . . . . . hey Abby see that? Look at that varmint running away."

"I don’t understand sir, I thought he liked to play and now he’s running like all get out through that tall grass by the field. I’ll bet he doesn’t even come back. Was it something we said?"

"Well, Abby, maybe you were a little rough on him. And he was all slimy wet because you had him in your mouth."

"Aw. . . . That don’t mean anything anyhow. I caught that butterfly once, remember, and carried him around in my mouth and then spit him out. All we did was wait for him to dry up a bit and then he flew off. So that gopher was OK. Honest."

"Well, next time be careful with the gophers. Bark at them and scare them out of here or something but maybe don’t play so rough with them."

"Oh, alright. Shucks. . . . . . say. . . . . . . can I have your glove?"

Life is faster for Keeper now that she lives in the country

"Well . . . . . you know . . . . . . villains and such."

Now Keeper, that’s a pretty wide field, the villain field I mean. Are you barking at a cow, a horse, a gopher, a coyote, an elk, a deer and other such things? Or just one villain in particular."

"Oh boy, sir, tonight it’s one villain in particular for sure!!!"

"Oh well, I see. So which villain would that be?"

"Well, sir, you see way down in the valley there, well sir, I remembered from this afternoon there were some dogs down there digging holes and looking for gophers and mice and such . And I could see them down there this afternoon so I didn’t have to bark cause I could see them from a long way. But it’s getting on night now and it’s a bit dark but let me tell you something sir I can’t see them much but I think I can hear them sneaking up on us!!!"

"Holy crow Keeper!!!. You don’t say!!! Now . . . . why is they sneaking up on us?"

"Oh sir, they is terrible, terrible villains, those dogs down there. Everybody knows it and if I must say sir I’m a little surprised you haven’t heard it yourself. Why, they’z into all sorts of terrible things like tortures and stuff."

"Tortures!!!"

"Oh yes sir, if they wuz to capture you why I’d be very afraid for your very life I would indeed sir. They’z very, very bad.

"And it’s just these dogs that do that?"

"Oh heck no sir. They all do it. All the deer, moose, coyote, elk, and gophers all do it. Oh yes sir, indeed sir, we gotta be on top of our toes so we can stay out of their evil clutches."

"Well heck Keeper, that’s good to know. Since you explained it so good I guess that’s OK. But listen, when you’re barking towards sunset to warn those evil critters away can you move down the field a piece? Your ma Carol and I can’t read too good with you barking so close."

"Sure . . . . no problem. But . . . . uh. . . . . you’ll come rescue me if I get captured won’t you? I don’t know if I could hold up under tortures and stuff. I might spill the beans!!!!"

"The beans?"

"Oh you know, secrets and the like. They might grill me a bit and I might tell them everything!!!"

"Jeez Keeper, I never thought of that. Well sure, we’ll come and rescue yourself if you get captured and start spilling the beans on us. But you just move away from the house a bit before you bark. And keep a good lookout as we’re all depending mightily on you coming through."

"Oh yes sir, I’ll watch out good!!!"

"Thanks Keeper."